Better Persuasion Through Acceptance
I was at a sales seminar about a year ago, when I heard a piece of advice so stereotypically salesy that I nearly did a spit-take: “you can’t be willing to take ‘no’ for an answer”. Sure it was actually not that candidly said, but distilled down, that was clearly the message being conveyed. I felt like I was being coached by Tom Cruise’s character in Magnolia.
Now, I’ve only done sales for a few years, at a few companies, but I just don’t buy this approach. I think not only should you be willing to take “no” for answer, but you should actually take that approach even further. You should accept the “no” and take advantage of it as an opportunity to teach you something about your approach, about the thing you’re selling, and about the market.
By the way, this doesn’t just apply to selling products or services for money. It applies to anything that you’re trying to convince someone of — any kind of persuasion. It’s easy advice to generalize: if you don’t hear the refusals you encounter loud and clear, you miss a great opportunity for growth — both personally and professionally.
How Did I Fall Short in Selling?
You’re not perfect. Neither am I. You should already know that. Somehow, though, when we get caught up in that quixotic quest to drive to drive growth in our business or product, we suspend that particular belief while we persist beyond the point of reason to just sell, damnit!
Doing that, however, has two unsavory effects. First, it can land a lot of customers who are not a great fit — ones who are skeptical and who may end up dropping whatever you’re selling like a bad habit very quickly or just never really appreciating what you’ve sold them.
Second, it can keep you from understanding what you might need to change about your approach. You can fail to learn things that could make otherwise skeptical customers actually be on your side.
I won’t be the first (or last) writer on this topic to quote Simon Sinek, who said: “People don’t buy what you do; they buy why you do it. And what you do simply proves what you believe.”
I’ve found this to be true for the customers who stick with you. If they have truly bought in, you won’t have to constantly work to keep them. Meanwhile, customers who you roped in with the same old process will be looking for any reason to jump ship, or just never really be engaged.
You should always be looking to make your pitch the kind that gets customers to buy why. When it becomes clear that your approach is not working to close the deal, that doesn’t mean you should double down. It means that the why isn’t clear enough.
So don’t be afraid to take the opportunity to use their “no” as an opportunity to find out how your why isn’t quite getting to them — and what you can do to change that for them, or for future clients.
How is What I’m Selling Falling Short?
Your product or service is not for everyone.
Seriously, not everyone wants everything, at least not now. And some people will not be ready for what you’re selling right now. It could be because they don’t have a need for it, or it could be because you need to change something about it. A prospect telling you “no” is a great way to get data on what it is about your company, product, or service that could stand to be changed a bit.
A company that refuses to change itself and what it sells is a company that stands to miss a lot of potential growth. This is not to say that you should go making alterations to your product or service each time you get feedback.
Like I said, your thing — whatever it is — is not for everyone. But at least be willing to understand why you were turned down, so you can catalog the reasons, and look for trends that tell you something you may need to change. Many times it makes sense not to change anything — at least not now. But don’t underestimate the people in the marketplace. You do so at your own peril.
How is the Market Different Now vs. the Last Time I Made a Sale?
The worst thing you can do is to take a rejection of your sales pitch as a personal rejection. It rarely is. Remember, you’re selling to people who have various forces putting pressure on them. They have limited funds, they have expectations placed upon them for the things they purchase. That applies whether you’re selling B2B or directly to consumers.
In both cases, the biggest external factor that you need to work to understand is the market. When the market changes, it flows into the attitudes of the people who are saying “yes” or “no” to what you’re selling. It changes constantly — now more than ever, thanks to the amount of data flooding everyone’s decision-making process.
When you hear “no”, do a little digging to see if perhaps that “no” was actually more of a “the market for your product has been changing, and it made me re-evaluate things.”
You’ll want to understand how that happened, and take it back to either alter your product , or at least alter your approach. Again, you don’t need to change anything because of it. But refusing an opportunity to get that data is shortsighted.
Always Be Willing to Walk
The takeaway here is this:
Be willing to walk away from a pitch that doesn’t get you the business. But never be willing to walk away without a clear understanding of why it didn’t work.
Being super aggressive will quickly shut the window of opportunity to find that out.
Admittedly, this is harder to do for some business models, and you won’t always be able to get feedback on a “no”. That’s okay. It’s all about two things: (a) respect the potential buyer’s ability to make a decision (b) always be willing to learn from them when they say no — and respect if they are no longer willing to be engaged.
We’re all people who just want to be happy and do a good job — whether we’re buying or selling. Remembering that will help you go far. Forgetting it is going to make things a lot more difficult.
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